This Journey

In the last couple of months, there have been several thousand miles spent on the road, and many hours spent thinking, praying, wrestling, and resting. I feel God has been moving closer to me in ways I’ve never seen (or noticed) before. I think I’ve been growing up some more.

I was somewhere in the middle of Nebraska when I first heard this song. I’ve had the Matthew Perryman Jones CD for a while – but somehow this one had never grabbed my attention. It appeals to my ideals – my high expectations – who I want to be. It challenges my fears and insecurities. When I heard it, I was transfixed.

There are a few phrases in here that seize my heart – and fill me with a hope that I will continue to be molded by the hands of the Potter to BE this man – and fill me with the desire to continue to choose, act, take initiative, and step it up and BE who I am becoming – yet not for myself, but for my community, whoever that is and whoever it may be, and for the least of these – on the streets of Rio, in the deserts of the Sudan, in the slums of Calcutta, in the inner cities of Chicago and LA, in the lonely and isolated castles of solitude and regret – in their oh so many guises… Carrying the hope and life of Christ out to the periphery – to the bleeding points of humanity. Join w/ me on this journey…

I will rise and I will stand, getting off of my knees and my hands.
I will walk as You lead, and look beyond what I can see.
I will speak from my heart and not let pride tear truth apart.
I won’t fear another man ‘cause he is dust just like I am.

I will learn as I go, test the things that I think I know.
I will love without return, light my fears on fire and watch them burn.
I will hope in unseen things, and I will dance when my heart sings.
I’ll believe just like a child, let my fondest dreams run wild.

I will rest for a short while then I’ll go another mile.
I will be what I believe and I will give as I receive.
I will choose without regret cause rolling dice is a coward’s bet.
I will seek for what is real, not let pain teach me how to feel.

Cause in this journey when the night is done,
I will set my face towards the sun.
I will not look back. No, I will not look back.

The night is done. The dawn is breaking. Let’s start walking…



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2 responses to “This Journey

  1. Brandon

    Ben this is Brandon from the Azusa mission team. I know this is random but I was reading one of your letters and I seend that Jefferson, and Everton died. Im deeply sorry for the loss. But just to make sure, was Everton the guy that hung out with us that one time in the park when there was a craft fair going on? I know that I walked to the crystal cathedral with a guy and I thought that it was Everton but i’m not sure. But as for your struggles that your going through I hope that God answers your questions. I will keep you in my prayers brother and may God continue to guide you as you step out. Hit me back when you have some time. My email is


  2. Melanie

    As I read these words it soon became a song that I began sing, Beautiful

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